Friday, August 27, 2004
Regis Reigns. This week, Regis Philbin took the Guinness World Record as the one person who has had more hours on television than any other. He deserves it. From his days as sidekick to Joey Bishop on ABC’s late-nite challenge to NBC’s Tonight Show thru various local news and talk shows to Who Wants To Be a Millionaire and, for 16 years, his almost always watchable morning fluff talkshow, LIVE (now “with Regis and Kelly”, formerly “with Regis and Kathie Lee”), to his many cameos on Letterman, Regis has been a familiar and fondly received presence in our homes for decades.
+
His present co-host, Kelly Ripa, is an overexposed, youngish blonde woman, ‘perky’ and outgoing, whose one great virtue (from my Newark perspective) is that she is from New Jersey tho now she is too hotsie-totsie to summer at the Jersey Shore, but hangs out in “The Hamptons” with the rich and famous. She also was a regular on the soap opera All My Children when she got the job on LIVE, and now is one of two female leads on the execrable ABC primetime “comedy” Faith and Hope. (Bizarrely, Faith Ford, the other female lead in that awful mess, plays “Hope”! What were they thinking? Well, what were they thinking (a) when they created that trash and (b) when they renewed it for next year?)
+
Kelly Ripa is overemployed, in an industry in which underemployment or complete unemployment is more the rule. An uncountable host of talented, personable people can’t find so much as one job in entertainment, while the minimally talented and questionably personable Kelly Ripa gets job after job.
+
Overmployment is not unique to Ms. Ripa, of course. Eddie Murphy, who is at least an extremely talented comedian and actor, has repeatedly endeavored to show off his ‘enormous gifts’ by playing multiple parts in black-oriented movies, in the process taking multiple jobs away from underemployed black actors and actresses who could really use the work and the chance to break out themselves. How many remarkable talents is Eddie Murphy keeping from being discovered by hogging so many roles? I ask the same question of other actors who hog multiple roles in one film or multiple jobs around the entertainment industry. For every actor you see in two shows or commercial campaigns, there's an actor who gets none, and not necessarily because s/he's not talented. It's just 'the breaks'.
+
On today’s show, I discovered that Faith Ford is also stealing work away from others, because in addition to her role in the detestable Faith and Hope, she is starring in a Vin Diesel film, Pacifier! Odious. And that film is to be made in TORONTO!, as so many films are made in Toronto or Vancouver, ROBBING American bit players, extras, liting people, sound people, caterers, limo drivers, etc., of badly needed work. We really need to crack down on "runaway productions", and everyone who makes abroad movies or TV shows that could perfectly well be made in the United States should be shunned by media and public alike.
+
Whoopi Goldberg was asked to star in a film she was co-producing, to be filmed in Toronto. She asked how much more it would cost to make in New York. When told, "a million dollars", she said, 'Take it from my share' and made the film in New York. That's an American.
+
Regis Philbin has had more than one show-biz job at a time, but they were roles that others would have had trouble filling. Who else could have made Millionaire so big for so long?
+
"Rege" is a unique talent, an easygoing conversationalist whose persona is an irritable Everyman with famous friends. He’s likable and busy, and the things he does are things that people in Middle America are happy to hear about, even if they wouldn’t be particularly comfortable doing them themselves. Regis lunches with the rich and famous; is on a first-name basis with "The Donald" (Trump), who has been known to call in during LIVE; and attends various roasts and benefits with hordes of celebrities, events that you and I might find ineffably boring but he manages to make seem diverting, at least in two minutes’ retelling. He also plays tennis, at age 73!, so is quite a role model for the ancient.
+
When he hosted Millionaire, he was a perfect mix of the TV star we all know and someone we felt was really rooting for the little guy. Oddly, he almost ALWAYS intoned incorrectly the keynote question “Who wants to be a millionaire?” stressing “wants” rather than "Who" and “millionaire”. He was told about that over and over again, but after saying it right once or twice, would quickly revert to his own idiosyncratic rendering. If anyone else did that, the audience would rebel with irritation. When Regis did it, we let it go.
+
That Regis is likable and does his job well does not justify his being hugely overpaid. As Kelly Ripa observed today, in joking about how much it would cost to have guest Vin Diesel direct a film for them, ‘Regis is very wealthy.’ How did he get his money? Sitting on a stool and chatting, shmoozing with celebrities about nothing. Should this be rewarded with enormous wealth? I don’t think so. He shouldn’t mind paying a high rate on the upper portions of his ill-gotten gain so that people who work very hard at really difficult and sometimes unpleasant jobs, get to keep more of their well-earned pittance.
+
Love ya, Regis, but you’re rich, and my motto is now and always will be, “Soak the rich!”