How Big Iz tha Sun, Hou Smaul Maan.

(This blog is published, first, in phonetic (Fanetik) spelling and only then in standard English spelling. If you wish to skip to the traditionally spelled text (albeit with a few simplifications here and there), click here.)
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Fienale sum sens haaz eemerjd agenst tha yeerz-laung kaampaen uv propagaanda about "maan-maed gloebal waurming". Aan ekstreemle saveer winter, not just in the Yoonietad Staets but in the Orktik, Yuerap, aand Chiena aaz wel, haaz fienale kauzd lorj numberz uv peepool tu kweschan tha fervant, neerle-reelijas aurtthadokse, tha reeseevd wizdam thaat peepool or berning the Ertth tu a sinder. Maebe thair'z hoep faur tha hyueman raes aafter aul.
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Hou iz it posibool thaat we kood haav a maur saveer winter in ene yeer thaan tha yeer beefaur if peepool or kauzing the Ertth tu waurm ineksarable tu tha point uv gloebal dazertifikaeshan, maas ekstingkshanz, aand the end uv lief on this plaanat aaz faurtoeld bi tha "gloebal-waurming" Profats uv Duem, aurkastraetad under tha baton uv Miestro Aal Gaur? Did we fienale end aul outpauringz uv korban dieyoksied, metthaen, aand uther "greenhous gaasaz"? Aand did we stop palueting the oeshanz aand thus dastroiying fietoeplaangktan, such thaat aul theez stork chaenjaz haav sudanle permitad green plaants werldwied tu abzaurb CO₂ aand loewer tha plaanatere tempracher? Did we in faakt chaenj ENEETTHING this paast yeer aaz tu driev tempracherz doun? No, we did not. Hou, then, kood tha tempracher posible haav plumatad?
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Tha premis thaat Maan iz reesponsibool faur gloebal waurming iz fauls, aand haaz just bin dispruevd beeyond reedeeming.
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It iz not tha tiene, insignifikant nutthing in tha kozmik yuenivers, Maan (witth Wooman, aand Chieyald) thaat deeterminz gloebal waurmtth aur koeld, but tha Sun. Peereeyad. Thaat shood be the end uv tha diskushan. But it woen't be. Beekauz peepool or stuepid aand aaragant. "Yes, it's aul about yu", aaz komade rieterz or wunt tu poot in tha mouthz uv kondasending kaarakterz riele pungkchering a preetenshas fuel'z baluen. Thaat meenz, uv kaurs, the opasit: it's not about yu, aat aul.
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Tha Sun duz not reevolv around the Ertth, aand the Ertth duz not reevolv around Maan. Maan iz aan iesalaetad, triveeyahl ekskresans in tha tieneeyast fraakshan uv tha loewast paurshan uv aan eenaurmas aatmasfeer, okyoopieying in signifikant numberz perhaaps 12% uv tha plaanat's serfas. Aabsant fool-skail nuekleeyer waur, nutthing Maan duz kaan chaenj tha plaanat's kliemat. Aand eevan a "nuekleeyer winter" woodan't laast maur thaan a fyu yeerz, beeyond hwich aul tha naurmz uv plaanatere kliemat wood reezuem thair yuezhuewal kaurs, aaz tho nuekleeyer winter haad never akerd, aand Maan haad never egzistad.
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We kaan't stop taurnaedoez frum faurming, naur eether stop naur stort herikaenz. We kaan't eevan maek it raen reelieyable, eevan hwen kloudz or prezant. Aand we kaan't pradues kloudz frum dri air. We kaan't raez tha plaanat's tempracher naur loewer it. We kaan't du eneetthing about tha wether (shaurt-faez meeteeyaralojikal vaareeyaeshan), much les tha kliemat. Maan iz nutthing. Beefaur Maan arievd on this plaanat, thair wer waurm peereeyadz aand koeld peereeyadz, tiemz hwen tha poelz wer ies-fre, aand uther tiemz hwen maasiv sheets uv ies aadvaanst tthouzandz uv mieyalz out frum boetth poelz, witthout Maan duewing eneetthing tu kauz eether fanomanon.
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In tha waurm peereeyadz, lief flerisht oever moest uv tha plaanat's serfas aand in its seez. Tha bode tempracher uv eech kreecher toodae mae indeed be aan ortifaakt uv tha tempracher hwen thaat speesheez eevolvd. Hwen Ies Aejaz dastroid evreetthing on tha ground oever milyanz uv skwair mieyalz, lief kantinyued tu flerish hwair the ies wuz not, aand aaz the ies reetreetad, lief foloed, aafter a fyu dekaedz (aur senchereeez) in hwich plaants re-estaablisht themselvz, aaz praviedad aanimalz sumtthing tu eet.
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Hwen Maan in hiz infinit stuepidite aand eevool haaz dastroid himself tthru oeverpopyoolaeshan aand waurz, tha plaanat wil go on, witth waurm yeerz aand koeld, witth speesheez yet unoen filing evre nich nou fild bi Maan. We or nutthing, aand tha suener we reeyaliez it aand aproech tha werld witth hyuemilite, tha suener we wil taek ouwer plaes in tha graand skeem aand stop tthingking we or tha graand skeem.
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(Tha kerant Y.S. militere detth toel in Eerok, akaurding tu tha websiet "Eerok Koewalishan Kaazhuewalteez", iz 4,000 — faur Izreeyal.)
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How Big Is the Sun, How Small Man.

Finally some sense has emerged against the years-long campaign of propaganda about "man-made global warming". An extremely severe winter, not just in the United States but in the Arctic, Europe, and China as well, has finally caused large numbers of people to question the fervent, nearly religious orthodoxy, the received wisdom that people are burning the Earth to a cinder. Maybe there's hope for the human race after all.
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How is it possible that we could have a more severe winter in any year than the year before if people are causing the Earth to warm inexorably to the point of global desertification, mass extinctions, and the end of life on this planet as foretold by the "global-warming" Prophets of Doom, orchestrated under the baton of Maestro Al Gore? Did we finally end all outpourings of carbon dioxide, methane, and other "greenhouse gases"? Did we regrow the rainforests and temperate forests that we had been cutting down? And did we stop polluting the oceans and thus destroying phytoplankton, such that all these stark changes have suddenly permitted green plants worldwide to absorb CO₂ and lower the planetary temperature? Did we in fact change ANYTHING this past year as to drive temperatures down? No, we did not. How, then, could the temperature possibly have plummeted?
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The premise that Man is responsible for global warming is false, and has just been disproved beyond redeeming.
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It is not the tiny, insignificant nothing in the cosmic universe, Man (with Woman, and Child) that determines global warmth or cold, but the Sun. Period. That should be the end of the discussion. But it won't be. Because people are stupid and arrogant. "Yes, it's all about you", as comedy writers are wont to put in the mouths of condescending characters wryly puncturing a pretentious fool's balloon. That means, of course, the opposite: it's not about you, at all.
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The Sun does not revolve around the Earth, and the Earth does not revolve around Man. Man is an isolated, trivial excrescence in the tiniest fraction of the lowest portion of an enormous atmosphere, occupying in significant numbers perhaps 12% of the planet's surface. Absent full-scale nuclear war, nothing man does can change the planet's climate. And even a "nuclear winter" wouldn't last more than a few years, beyond which all the norms of planetary climate would resume their usual course, as tho nuclear winter had never occurred, and Man had never existed.
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We can't stop tornados from forming, nor either stop nor start hurricanes. We can't even make it rain reliably, even when clouds are present. And we can't produce clouds from dry air. We can't raise the planet's temperature nor lower it. We can't do anything about the weather (short-phase meteorological variation), much less the climate. Man is nothing. Before Man arrived on this planet, there were warm periods and cold periods, times when the poles were ice-free, and other times when massive sheets of ice advanced thousands of miles out from both poles, without Man doing anything to cause either phenomenon.
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In the warm periods, life flourished over most of the planet's surface and in its seas. The body temperature of each creature today may indeed be an artifact of the temperature when that species evolved. When Ice Ages destroyed everything on the ground over millions of square miles, life continued to flourish where the ice was not, and as the ice retreated, life followed, after a few decades (or centuries) in which plants re-established themselves, as provided animals something to eat.
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When Man in his infinite stupidity and evil has destroyed himself thru overpopulation and wars, the planet will go on, with warm years and cold, with species yet unknown filling every niche now filled by Man. We are nothing, and the sooner we realize it and approach the world with humility, the sooner we will take our place in the grand scheme and stop thinking we are the grand scheme.
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(The current U.S. military death toll in Iraq, according to the website "Iraq Coalition Casualties", is 4,000 — for Israel.)




- posted by L. Craig Schoonmaker @ 11:59 PM